Studying abroad in France is a thrilling adventure, full of unique cultural experiences that will shape your personal and academic life. France is renowned for its art, history, cuisine, and, of course, its culture. If you’re preparing to study abroad in France, you’ll want to understand not only the academic expectations but also the local social norms and etiquette that define French interactions.
In this guide, I’ll walk you through the ins and outs of French etiquette—from how to greet someone to dining customs, conversation styles, and even the importance of punctuality. By understanding these nuances, you’ll feel more confident and comfortable as you navigate your study abroad experience in one of the most iconic countries in the world.
Before diving into specific etiquette rules, it’s important to grasp the broader cultural context. In France, etiquette is not just a matter of good manners—it’s a reflection of one’s upbringing, respect for others, and understanding of social hierarchies. From a simple greeting to a formal dinner, every action in French culture has a certain level of formality attached to it.
The Role of Etiquette in French Society
In France, etiquette is seen as an essential part of maintaining social harmony and respect. It’s not just about following rules; it’s about honoring the people around you. French society places a high value on politeness, formality, and the subtlety of interactions. Whether you’re meeting someone for the first time or interacting with a professor, your behavior and communication style will be noticed.
Key French Values to Keep in Mind
Several cultural values guide French behavior. The French value intellectual conversations, often discussing art, politics, and philosophy with passion. They also cherish the importance of family and personal relationships, often placing these at the center of their lives. However, the French tend to maintain a balance between their public and private personas, which means they might not open up easily to strangers.
When you first arrive in France, one of the first things you'll notice is how important greetings are. It’s not just a matter of saying “hello”—it’s a whole ritual. Understanding the right way to greet someone is essential in making a good impression and respecting the local culture.
The French Greeting Ritual
The most common greeting in France is a handshake, but don’t be surprised if you encounter "la bise," the customary cheek kiss. This is common among friends and acquaintances, but the number of kisses varies depending on the region—two kisses are standard in Paris, but in some areas, it could be as many as four!
In formal settings, you’ll stick with a handshake, making sure it’s firm but not too strong. It’s important to make eye contact and say “Bonjour” (Good morning) or “Bonsoir” (Good evening), depending on the time of day. In fact, not saying “Bonjour” when entering a store or café can come off as rude.
Formal vs. Informal Greetings
When greeting people you don’t know well or those in positions of authority, such as professors or employers, use “vous” (the formal “you”) instead of “tu” (the informal “you”). Once a more personal relationship develops, you may be invited to switch to “tu,” but until then, “vous” should be your default.
Introducing Yourself
When introducing yourself, simply say, “Je m’appelle [Your Name]” (My name is [Your Name]). If you’re in a formal setting, it’s common to add a polite phrase like “Enchanté(e)” (Nice to meet you). Pay attention to your posture, and don’t forget to smile!
France is famous for its cuisine, and dining is more than just about eating—it’s an event. Meals are often long and leisurely affairs, and following the proper etiquette can help you navigate any social dinner setting in France.
Table Manners
One of the first things you’ll notice at the dinner table in France is the emphasis on proper posture. Keep your hands on the table (but not your elbows), and remember to chew with your mouth closed. This is a sign of refinement. Also, avoid using your phone at the table—it’s considered bad manners.
French Dining Structure
In France, a typical meal consists of multiple courses: entrée (starter), plat principal (main course), fromage (cheese), and dessert. Meals are an opportunity to savor flavors and enjoy good conversation. Don't rush through the meal—take your time and engage with your fellow diners.
What to Avoid at the Table
Don’t make negative comments about the food. Even if it’s not to your liking, it’s best to stay positive and polite. If you’re offered more food or drink, it’s polite to decline once but never refuse a second time.
Paying the Bill
In most cases, people pay for their own meals in casual settings, though it’s becoming more common to split the check. If you’re in a more formal setting or with a group, one person might offer to pay, and the others may politely offer to chip in. Tipping in France is already included in the bill (service compris), but it’s customary to leave a small tip for good service (around 5-10%).
Understanding how to communicate appropriately in French culture is essential, whether you’re in a formal setting or enjoying casual conversations with new friends.
Respecting Personal Space
The French value personal space but have a different sense of proximity compared to other cultures. While people in France tend to stand closer during conversations than you might expect, there’s still a mutual respect for personal boundaries.
Communication Style
French communication is generally formal, especially in public or professional settings. The French appreciate thoughtful, intellectual conversation. They enjoy discussing topics such as politics, culture, and history. It’s not uncommon for them to express their opinions with passion, so feel free to join in—but always remain respectful and avoid dominating the conversation.
Important Topics to Avoid
In general, avoid talking about sensitive topics like money, politics, or religion when you first meet someone. These can be seen as intrusive or inappropriate. Instead, stick to lighter topics such as travel, the weather, or food.
Being a Good Listener
In France, being a good listener is just as important as contributing to the conversation. Let others speak, and respond thoughtfully. This shows respect for their views and creates an atmosphere of mutual respect.
Public behavior in France is often quite different from what you might be used to. Whether you’re riding the metro, shopping, or simply walking down the street, there are a few unwritten rules to follow.
Public Behavior
In public spaces, especially on public transportation, it's expected that you remain quiet and respectful. Loud talking or phone conversations are seen as impolite. When you’re in a café or restaurant, it’s courteous to acknowledge the staff with a “Bonjour” when you enter, and it’s considered rude to leave without saying goodbye.
Dress Code and Appearance
The French are known for their impeccable sense of style, and they generally dress more formally than many other cultures. While you don’t need to wear a suit everywhere, it's important to look polished. Avoid wearing overly casual clothing like sweatpants or flip-flops when out in public, especially in cities like Paris.
Queuing and Politeness
When waiting in line, it’s customary to acknowledge those around you with a polite greeting. Pushing or cutting in line is considered rude. If you’re unsure about where to stand, observe the locals and follow their lead.
Punctuality is highly valued in France. Being late, especially for formal events or professional meetings, is seen as disrespectful. If you’re running late, it’s polite to send a message or call to let the host know. In informal settings, being 10-15 minutes late might be acceptable, but in general, try to be on time.
Living in France means more than just adhering to etiquette rules—it’s about embracing the French lifestyle.
Building Relationships in France
French friendships tend to develop more slowly than in some other cultures. It may take time to move from formal greetings to deeper, more personal connections. The French appreciate loyalty and trust, and once you’ve formed a bond, you’ll find that French people can be very warm and welcoming.
Work-Life Balance
The French are known for valuing their leisure time, especially when it comes to the weekends. Work is important, but they make a conscious effort to disconnect from work when it’s time to relax. If you’re invited to someone’s home on a weekend, it’s a good idea to respect this time and not bring up work or business topics.
France is a country of regions, and each one has its own quirks when it comes to etiquette.
Northern France vs. Southern France
In the north, people tend to be more reserved, while in the south, people are generally more laid-back and relaxed in their social interactions. However, regardless of where you are, politeness and respect are key.
Urban vs. Rural Etiquette
Urban areas like Paris have a faster-paced, more formal atmosphere, whereas rural areas tend to be more relaxed. In smaller towns, you may find that people greet each other more personally and are more willing to engage in conversation.
To wrap up, here are a few quick tips for navigating French etiquette:
By embracing these cultural norms and showing respect for French customs, you’ll find your study abroad experience to be even more rewarding.